edit finished!

The latest edit of AfterQuest is finished. Now I'll send it to my continuity checker, then hopefully the beta readers will have finished Taarwysha and I can interest them in AfterQuest.

Ever since I first finished this thing, I've been working on the best description of it. With four main characters, it's been hard trying to tie it all together succinctly. If I break them apart, it's easier (if a little tonge-in-cheek).

For Elsie: Girl meets Elf, girl loved Elf, girl loses Elf. Elf gets girl back.
For Kenny: Football player learns to be swordsman, saves the city, and gets the girl.

The query 'hook' I'm currently playing with focuses more on Elsie since she goes through the biggest changes in the book and it starts out:

Like a real-life Alice or Dorothy, Elsie Conners was in a strange land without a way home, only stories of a device that used to exist. She's with three other Humans in a city of Elves with a Troll invasion imminent. The Elves tell Elsie she has the ability for telepathic communication used by a handful of Elves and agrees to be trained while they search for the way home. She falls in love with a telepathic Elf and is in mental contact with him when he is attacked in a jungle ambush. Dazed and depressed, she continues to help the Elven council during the final days of the battle and the four Humans are sent home.

Back at home, she persuades her parents that she is fit to return to school, hoping to reunite with the others who'd been in the Elven city with her, hoping they might be the key to returning to a normal life.

It needs something more. I'm hoping I can get beta readers to tell me what struck them as the main plot points so I can emphasize those points in the hook.